Thursday, August 27, 2009

How to Win Friends & Influence People: Part 3

I’m definitely hooked on reading this book at this point. It now goes where I go and it’s hard to put down. I’m so glad I picked this one up and wished I had done it a lot sooner. This one does live up to all the hype.

Chapter 3: “He who can do this has the whole world with him. He who cannot walks a lonely way.”

We all know what we want in life. It may be a nice house, successful career, happy family, new car, and so on. How many of us focus on what other people want? Ever talked with someone and the most popular word was “I”? You probably get tired of that after awhile.

As Dale  puts it:

So the only way on earth to influence other people is talk about what they want and show them how to get it.

I think we are more drawn to people and friends that are interested in us. When we show interest in other people wants and desires they’ll show more in us. The key is to listen to other people and be attentive to there desires.

The next time your trying to persuade someone to do something like putting your kids to bed, negotiating a business deal, selling something to try to think of how it relates to them and what they want. What you want and what they want can be two different things. If you stop, listen and focus on what they are concerned with you have a better chance of finding a solution that works for the both of you.

Dale Carnegie Principle: Arouse in the other person an eager want.

Next Chapter: Do this and you’ll be welcome anywhere

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